INTRODUCTION:

In Today’s world, especially in the 21st century, many single ladies and men are wondering  how on earth you will ever find a godly person to marry or in a relationship that will lead to marriage. Few people are even worried that there are no godly people in our time to marry. Be assured, there are godly people with exceptional marriageable qualities to spend the rest of your life with. Providence knows what we need to make us grateful, joyful and focused with our life- spouse. 

Where Are The Godly People Hiding?

Good godly men and women are not hiding out. You won’t find a good man or woman where Godlessness exists unless he / she is passionate about explaining an adventure, purpose, agenda and a set-goal for the facilitation of a dream. Godly people are more reserved and thoughtful. They may have certain weaknesses as humans, notwithstanding they are brought up to stand for purpose and stand as the pillar of their marriage and spouse. It is paramount to note that these godly people we are talking about may have gone through diverse failures, disappointments, hurts and heartaches because of the decisions they made in the past before learning from experience and errors.

There is a need to understand, from this perspective as some may envisage, the word ”godly” is a trans-cultural word that cuts across other religions and life as a whole so far as we all spend a time on this earth. More so, I urge  that this godly person must not be considered religiously, otherwise our discussion will lose the pivot and positive effect it will have on our journey in finding a godly person which is of ultimate importance. 

To be accurate and straightforward on the subject matter, the Greek translation of ”godly” is theosevis (adjective) meaning ”pious and devout”. That means a person who is devoted to certain standards, skills, attributes and characteristics within the context of relationship or marriage etc. It must also be established that a pious person does not necessarily need to carry ”God” on his head for all people to know this is a godly person, but there is more to the subject than aligning ourselves within the parameter of the said subject religiously.

A very wonderful woman found a godly man as her driver. With discernment and thorough assessment they ended up marrying. They have been married for 10 years, had three children and are still going with grace and love. I must also note that although one can find godly people in different areas of life, it is essential to be prayerful since the ancient adage says ” It is not all that glitters that is gold”. 

While on the search to find a godly person if the relationship should progress into the courtship stage dont rush a relationship along by “giving into your emotions”. This may cause heartache and you may regret it later. Slow down…let perspective, focus, patience, tolerance and purpose take over. 

Observe actions and see if they align with words. Even a tendency to use white lies can become an issue. If they repeatedly use them to justify actions you should have an honest conversation about that. Practically, get to know the true character of your friendships before allowing yourself to become emotionally involved with the wrong person. Don’t allow your emotions to lead your friendships but allow them to follow behind. There is no hurry to rush into anything. An experience not to forget, this alone is an acid test. Your heart (metaphorically) wants you to find your life mate but not if it means to sacrifice your mind and body in the process. Don’t give any wo / man your mind and body if there is no commitment for the future, ever! Why on earth would you want to do that?

Always be discerning, learning to be quiet with your emotions is one of the topmost hallmarks and also be cautious with your emotions. Tolerance is a virtue when looking for a life – spouse. Time is the thermometer to test true character, then you can decide the progression of the relationship before you fully commit to say ”I do” or marriage.

”How To Find A Godly Person”. The Merriam Webster Dictionary defines ”How” to mean ” By what means, for what reason: Why, to what degree, extent, or amount. To be precise in determining the crux of this last session, it is evident in layman’s language that we are going to look at what ways or to what extent can a Godly person be found. 

There are three characteristics that will identify a Godly person:

1. HUMILITY:

This word was derived from the Latin word ”humilis, meaning ”low”. That means, it must be a person who recognises and accepts reality through open-mindedness to truth i.e. no false pretence, just listening and learning. In a simple analogy, with a relationship, being willing to adapt, listen, be teachable and accepting the truth, not self-centred but building the relationship for the well-being of both.

Again, being low does not mean you should be quiet when things are not going well. Most people see correction in the face of misunderstanding as egoistic but this is a fallacy. Humility is not being daft, shy, quiet and ignoring the truth in order not to lose the object of my love: Be resilient to ensure truth is told or expressed in love, no matter the situation surrounding what happened. Humility is often thought to occur in the absence of Pride.

Pride manifests in people ”thinking they are better off, cleverer or richer”, for instance. On the other hand, in the absence of pride, you find humility, which sees no need for competition. In humility, you are nothing more and nothing less than the other people around you.

A real laboratory test of a godly person who is humble is no matter the hurt, pain, and heartache he is ready to apologize though it is painful and later find a conducive serene emotional stable atmosphere to discuss patiently matters that will affect the marriage or relationship (friendship). 

Humility is not about hiding away or becoming a ”wallflower’, but is about the realisation that your abilities and actions are not better or less. Humility is an essential ingredient in a godly person.

 2. CARING:

Godly persons do not play games. They pursue, court , and then marry you. This kind of godly wo/man is ready to give ear to your perspective and although there may be ambiguity in what is said, yet one is ready to sacrifice to go a long way in ensuring the other person is beaming with smiles.

It also said that a caring, godly person always stands as a securing wall of defence from external aggressions. This type of person keeps their mind sharp and desires to be wise so they can make good choices. Challenges, set-backs and flat out failures will happen, especially in relationships. And they will test your spirit, love and faith for the relationship or marriage. Having someone by your side that knows how to care, show kindness and compassion is important for you and your family. Watch a godly person in time of stress, do they give up quickly?

Again this type of a person is active and helps at home too. 

∙ They are best friends. 

∙ Always there for the you

∙ Protective but never abuse

∙ Protect the husband / wife from insults

∙ Never disrespect one another no matter who is at the advantage.

 ∙ Respect their religious, cultural, financial , social backgrounds. 

∙ Never make the you feel silly for what she he believes in.

∙ Romance, Touching and love making is the climax to the love they share.

 ∙ Giving of gifts, surprises and giving random kisses throughout the day or hugging.

 ∙ Supporting your dream, goal and vision is a great caring attitude.

 ∙ Focusing on all the good things and ignoring the things you do not like is ultimate. 

∙ When one falls sick or needs the other, make sure you do it with all your best efforts. 

∙ Looking after each other through sickness and health is a part of your marriage vows and not something to be taken lightly.

 3. GIVING:

”A godly man is never threatened by the gifts of a godly woman” (Rick Warren). This area does not only fall within the concept of physical needs. It cuts across, TIME. Be it spending time together, going out of their way all centred on the progression of the relationship.  Being in love is like solving the questions on an exam paper, some take a couple of seconds, some a bit longer and for some it is like forever. Remember, relationships are like an examination paper. To pass it, you have to understand the paper. Similarly to make your relationship fly high, you have to understand your partner when it comes to ”GIVING, TIME, MANAGEMENT”.

Giving and giving time to your relationship means understanding your partner’s preference, emotional, physical and financial giving, sharing perspective, spending time together and most importantly respecting each other. All love stories are tales of beginnings. When we talk about falling in love, we go to the beginning, to pinpoint the moment of free-fall. No matter the predicament in this area, the godly person is not always starting over in giving, this time, he is not starting from scratch, they are both starting from experience. It is also said, do not wait for opportunities to create them. Never compromised by dignity and honesty. 

In that same vein, do not wait for special occasions like going for holidays, wedding anniversaries, birthdays and Mothers /Fathers Day to come before spending time together and to give a gift to create them. 

A godly Person is giving,

 ∙ He spares time to serve the wife or vice versa (Community, family, and friends). Greed and selfishness have no place in a godly person’s heart. 

∙ Talents are not stored away for another day, but used well for the peace of the family.

    ∙ He is generous with his words. 

   ∙ He is quick to give encouragement, forgive and offer wisdom

  ∙ He extends kindness to all, no matter who they are.

   ∙ He is generous in love, time and money. 

Finally, your future husband / wife is not looking for his partner at the local bar, falling down drunk, with his / her clothes hanging out. Forgive the candor here, but we love you enough to tell you the truth. Start thinking about what it is that you want in a man / woman and start portraying it in your own life. Don’t be in a hurry. Be patient. Purpose, Providence, Destiny has orchestrated a divine encounter with your future husband / wife at the perfect time. Don’t rush it. Work on you, while you wait on him /her, just make sure they embody these three characteristics.

Healing Wings Support. 

Abigail Borquaye